Snippets

Not everything is always happy, exciting, or fun whilst trying to start an MFA. Though I'm over the biggest hurdle (getting accepted) there are still many things left in the process. Honestly I feel like I am at the worst point right now but I am trying my best to keep things in perspective and just going with the flow.

It seems that for the past five months I've done nothing but write various versions of personal statement, proposed thesis, motivations for study. These essays at some point, just start to sound the same and they get all jumbled in my head. Partly because I am frustrated to write yet another essay on the same topic and not be able to start working on these projects. I just want to start. It also doesn't help that I left my camera at my parents home this past year. I didn't want to risk losing or harming the equipment while I lived in Querétaro. I thought that my current job would motivate and keep me busy enough to not miss it. The reality is that I miss my hands on the camera. On the plus side, I now have my external hard drive full of photos that I have not uploaded or worked on. Hopefully after all this is over I'll have some time before July to work on them.

Why so many essays? Well I have been applying for extra funding. I have applied to the Jumex scholarship and am in the process of applying to FONCA-CONACYT (Fondo Nacional para la Cultura y las Artes) AND SEP (Secretaría de Educación Pública), both from the Mexican government. I actually don't know if I should apply to FONCA this year. I feel a little unprepared. Well, no not uprepared, I just feel like my submission will be stronger next year in terms of what they ask for. Then again, I should just try this year, I can always re-apply. No harm, no foul.

There's still so much left in the process on the road to an MFA. I still have to get my J1 Visa, find housing, furnish said housing option, move to DC, find airfare and tickets to DC, quit my current job, move out, and pack. On the Fulbright end of the spectrum there's still the Orientación de Despedida at COMEXUS and the Fulbright Gateway Program. Those are two things I am very excited for! Anyway, all of this before July 11th/a month and a half-ish. Can you see why I am freaking out?

I've been feeling sort of down and distant with my surroundings. Oddly, I am very in tune with myself. I understand that it isn't healthy to keep things bottled up but  on the other hand it's hard when you can't find anyone to talk to or don't want to aggravate someone with your issues.

Yesterday, I encountered this:

AHIMSA 
A Sanskrit word which encompasses compassion, awareness, self-care, and peace in the spirit of non-violence. This means, non-violence towards yourself and others. 

It takes me back to the "Golden Rule" of my elementary school: treat others the way you want to be treated. In reading about this, I did find peace.

So, I'd like to share this bit of knowledge with those of you who stumble across my blog. 

1. Do no harm.
2. Stop using the words: I can't, Fat, Stupid, and Brutal Honesty. 
3. Conscious action.

These steps can be taken to many lengths, some I can adapt to my lifestyle, others seem more difficult. Like, not eating meat. Ok, fine, I admit I am not eating much meat now but that is totally because cooking meat for one person is not that fun. However, a nice New York Strip...grilled...with steamed veggies.  I can though look for free range meat whenever possible. 

I know that this may be difficult but I really do want to live in a better way. I noticed that my isolation has taken some tolls in my personal life that I had not encountered before but I also know that I am strong enough to work through my issues. With a little guidance, I CAN! 

Like...last night. Did my first handstand EVER! I sought out some guidance from yogis and step by step I got on my hands and was able to lift one leg off the wall. 

I leave you with those three steps. Try and find the inner peace, guidance, and possitivity within you. I will. I need it. 


For further reading: 
http://www.doyouyoga.com/4-phrases-actions-promote-self-care/
http://www.doyouyoga.com/how-about-you-try-a-little-ahimsa/

SUBMISSION COMPLETE!



I worked on a new screenplay for this application. I wanted to write something on the comical side. Though, it wasn't like hysterically funny. I think it got the point across. I'm nervous but we shall see. It'll be the second application I upload. Two down, three to go.

Also, I plan to work on my YouTube channel this week. I have one too many backed up videos to edit. So hopefully after work, between yoga and eating, I'll edit little by little.

In the meantime here is a sneak peak:

Ok! So I HAVE to start going with my applications.

My goal: University of Miami and American University. At least get everything in minus the supplemental docs.

BTW...that's me, a little overwhlemed by how much I have procrastinated.

At the moment I am at work. Trying to work, TRYING! TGIF!!

My cure for the Thursday blues.

I have a bunch of projects in mind. I've decided its time to stop saying "ohhh I wish I could do that" or "Oh! That's a great idea I should do it". Basically stop saying the word SHOULD and transform it into WILL. 

So part of this is to work on some projects. First, this blog, which I think is going well. I'm probably posting less than what I am thinking of. 

Second, applications...this is working slowly but surely. I get distracted when I come home. The Office is  just too great a show. What really keeps me hooked is the Jim/Pam relationship. UGH! 

Third, expanding my photography. I have my professional website, my facebook website, a tumblr, and two instagrams. Yes, that's right two. Why? Well, I didn't bring my camera to Mexico. I figured I would be busy with work and Fulbright and not sure who my roommates would be so I didn't want to risk losing my equiptment. However I do have my iPhone camera. So I have my regular account which is featured on the home page. Also I started another one where I will focus on coffee. I've always wanted to streamline something and it has been a constant challenge in my work. So yeah, I want to try and create constant, interactive content for my sites.  

Fourth, my youtube channel. My sister made me start it to document a weekend in Mexico City and though I love the idea I haven't uploaded anymore content but I have a ton of backed up videos. I also want to edit them on my laptop or work computer instead of on the iPhone. 


Time to let the creative juices out! 

So I think I'm done with the design. Even though I started with a template I had to add a lot of html tweaking. I was less rusty than I thought! 

So, I'm pretty happy with the result...how about you?

On another note...one thing that kind of upset me today was that I had to miss out on one of my best friends birthdays and a little get together with my college girlfriends. My grandma is ill and my family needs help taking care of her. Even if its just being an extra body at home. Sometimes three people are needed to move her and everything. So well, though I feel bad, I'd rather stay here. Next year who knows how many opportunities I'll have to be with her. 

But yeah! I'm in the process of applying to my universities. I'll post about those later and I am really happy about this unification-of-my-social-media sites project! 

My right hand is super cold...